Ideal Bite

By the way-I am also vehemently opposed to changing my last name. Why can't men understand this? I have never met a guy who says they would be happy to have a wife that kept her last name and really meant it. It's usually just something they say to shut me up. Any dudes out there got any feedback for me?

i also actual like my last name and most likely wont change it. my aunt didnt change her last name for the longest time (until they had children) because she simply didnt like my uncles last name. this caused a serious uproar in our family. i dont understand why. How do you guys feel about a compromise- like hypenating both last names for a new one? Or him changing his last name?

Though I appreciate efforts to create a wedding culture that is healthier for people and the planet, I am increasingly concerned about the "feel good" world of carbon offsets. The New Internationalist magazine recently published an issue devoted to the complexities of carbon offsetting. If you're concerned about hosting a truly green wedding, I would definitely encourage you to avoid cruise ships, as the state of our oceans is dire indeed. No amount of tree planting can offset the damage caused by over-fishing, climate change and recreational pollution from the cruise industry and the like. Mother Jones is a great resource to explore the "fate of the oceans" further. (http://www.motherjones.com/toc/2006/03/index.html) New Internationalist Editor, Adam Ma'anit, encourages critical inquiry into the carbon offsetting debate in the July 2006 issue. (http://www.newint.org/issues/2006/07/01/) "As concern about climate change grows and our profligate use of fossil fuels continues unchecked, many companies, governments and individuals have been turning to 'carbon offsets' for a cheap and easy option to reduce their contribution to global warming. However, the principles underlying carbon offsetting are deeply flawed. Many of the projects that are claimed as being beneficial to the climate cause harm to communities and ecosystems in other ways. The boon that the carbon offset industry has given to large monoculture tree plantations in particular is of great concern. This issue explores the thorny and complex issues behind the emerging 'carbon offset' industry, the communities negatively affected by so-called climate friendly projects, and what really needs to happen to counter climate change."

Heather, I will be changing my name for the second time and you BETTER have the date on deck for JUNE 23rd, 2007 so you can dance at my wedding! My new last name will be Vail and I love it! The only eco friendly thing I can think of from our wedding is that we are taking the wedding party to the reception site in a limo (so that would save on emissions from 5 or 6 cars...right?) Great tip on the carbon offsetting!

You know, it's funny--when I got married, I told my husband I'd be happy to take his name if he wanted me to, and he basically said, "Gee, I don't care, you're the one who has to use the name." So I ended up keeping my own name as the default option (no need to change my driver's license and so on). It does get a bit tiresome having to explain to people, "I believe the appointment is in my husband's name," but it has one nice perk: If someone phones up and asks for "Mrs. So-and-So," I can immediately flag the caller as a telemarketer and get rid of her with the honest reply, "I'm sorry, there's no one here by that name." As for the carbon offsets, we chose the route of planning a wedding so simple there was almost nothing to offset. We had it in a state park, with the ceremony and reception at the same site, and we booked a block of rooms for our guests at a nearby hotel with shuttle service. The spread was mostly vegetarian and the only real eco-travesty was the disposable dishes and utensils (washing dishes at the park just wasn't an option). True, we didn't go all-out organic with everything (our budget wouldn't have permitted it), but I like to think the simplicity of the event helped keep the ecological footprint of our wedding pretty small.

For all the reasons Amy noted, I think it's irrresponsible of Ideal Bite, which I usually love, honor, and cherish, to say "go all out guilt-free!" You can never do that. There are impacts and in the world of pollutants, there's no such thing as a free lunch. Offsetting is offsetting, an attempt to help. It's not penance and it's not a cure for global warming.

Oops I meant Melanie Redman. Hard ot tell whose post goes with what name.

It's funny, I was just telling my guy this weekend that when we get married, we should strive for a green wedding. (Maybe this coincidence is a sign! I should tell him and get a kick out of watching the look on his face!) If anyone's interested in green wedding rings, check out www.greencarat.com. As far as the name changing goes: I'll keep mine thanks. My brother, on the other hand, recently got married and they are both going to change their names to a completely new name! They are going to combine their names to come up with something in between. I thought that was kinda cool.

I'm getting married this winter and I am trying my darndest to have a green or at least semi-green wedding. Recycled invites/save the dates, organic flowers, etc. Can't think of any dress ideas other than the fact that I don't intend to keep it hanging in a closet forever, which a lot of women do for some reason. What I'm actually curious about though is something called the I Do Foundation. They donate part of the purchase proceeds from your registry to whatever charity you choose (green and non-green), but other than one article online, I haven't heard anything about them so I'm worried if it's too good to be true.

SpaceShare has been setting up carpools and roomshares for conferences and festivals, and is about to start helping green weddings: http://www.spaceshare.com/green_weddings Getting the two sides to carpool together is a good way to build bonds between the families and friends while greening. I'm hoping to collect lots of green wedding ideas at http://www.green-weddings.org (not publicly launched yet) then announce the idea to the 300,000+ people who go to festivals where SpaceShare sets up carpools. Would love your green weddings suggestions, I want to announce all the other green wedding sites there if you have one, or even looking for a partner to launch this together!