Ideal Bite

Dr. Oz (if that is his real name) claims that men possess an alcohol digesting enzyme that allows them to process alcohol, but when women drink, the alcohol goes directly into the bloodstream.

My name is Hanah, and alcohol goes directly into my bloodstream. 

I have a few remedies, all of which work only if I am able to uproot myself from horizontal misery and travel along the path from remorse and self-loathing to active problem solving:

Steps:

Shower: Lay on the shower floor if you must, but do it, and end with cold water to shock your system.

Eat an egg and a banana (not together): Egg yolks contain large amounts of cysteine, which breaks down acetaldehyde, a hangover baddie. Bananas have potassium (you flushed all yours down the toilet last night

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As I mentioned last week, it wasn't my best year for gift wrapping. However, my gift tags, in and of themselves, went over much better. My usual way is to cut a shape out of paper scraps too small to fit a package. This year's saucy winner: an expertly crafted (if I do say so myself) voluptuous, Fellini-esque bosom, cut from gleaming gold paper and attached to a book of the director's (saucy-surreal) "dream" drawings.

(I do realize this is this week's second breast-related blog. We'll move on - let's hope - tomorrow.)

In any case, here are few sugary-sweet cards I've lined up for tag-snipping next year (awww...) - the smaller size makes them ideal:

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The best part about going to the recycling center as a kid was, quite honestly, not the learning experience (though I do think it helped make me aware of the situation), nor was it even the money I that I subsequently funneled to the GI Joe units headquartered in our hedges.

I am a boy, so it was definitely the Crushing of the Cans that I enjoyed the most. And now, as a man (by age standards, at least), I'm glad folks are still making it interesting. Wow.

-Senior Editor Mike...off to down a six-pack just for the CRV...

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Earlier this week, it was time to dig deep into my wrapping-supply box, where I stow every snippet of ribbon, every gift bag, and every scrap of unthrashed wrapping paper I find or receive throughout the year. It's a personal challenge to avoid buying anything new. For whatever reason (possibly more experience gifts flying about these days?), my collection was a bit peaked this time - a few strands of tangled raffia, a pink plastic flower with a missing petal, four possessed-looking nutcracker ornaments...

So, I'd just like to apologize now to my family for the appearance of many of their gifts - in particular the dented champagne canister with a "teddy bear inside a gift bag" ornament swinging off the side.

-Jenifer...off to hope that everyone's drunk enough on Mom's French Rum Punch not to notice...

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A couple years ago, before I joined Ideal Bite, I had a job at a nonprofit. It was a 12-month, "full-time" gig that toward the end required about 5 hours per week of my time.

I invested the other 35 hours in IM-ing, reading my favorite blogs at the time - Gawker and Go Fug Yourself - and clicking a bunch of charity sites. Slightly more satisfying than another 5 minutes spent on the random band name generator.

-Toshio...off to click twice...

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My mom cooks a few delicious dishes (chili, spaghetti, corned beef and cabbage), but her specialty's eating out. So when I knew we were running this tip a couple weeks ago, I challenged my mom to eat in (and local and organic, whenever possible) at least until today. She's always up for a challenge (you should see her play Sorry! - ruthless) and I joined her too in bringing my lunch to work. Still, I knew it would be hard for Mom, because my sister, Kristen, was coming home from college for winter break, and Mom always likes to take us out to her latest restaurant find.

Here, ways to make the challenge easier:

Go through your old cookbooks for ideas

Plan menus in advance

Buy a week's

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Another fairly eco winter option is a wood pellet basket. My parents bought one of these guys a few years back, and they just tossed it right into the fireplace. You fill it with easy-to-light pellets made from compressed wood waste (sawdust, etc.), so they're low-moisture and burn cleaner than your average stack of logs - which means less particulate matter in the air and less ash for you to clean up afterward.

You won't get the crackle of firewood, but they burn just as hot, if not hotter. Just look for pellets without additives and binders, which could contain petroleum-based junk.

-Senior Editor Mike...off to cuddle up with a vat of Irish coffee...

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I've had a dishwasher in my last four SF apartments - a rare thing for renters. The ironic part's that I actually like washing the dishes (stopper in/faucet off saves the most H2O). When you invite me to dinner, I may not bring a dish (wine, yes), but I will certainly clear your table and wash your dishes.

One exception: Washing dishes at work. Our office doesn't have a sink, so I have to haul my reusable everything 34 steps (yeah, I counted) to the hallway restroom, which kinda reminds me of when Seinfeld's Kramer rinses his salad while showering, 'cept this doesn't save time, so I wait days, entire weekends, before collecting my dirty dishes from my desk.

-Senior Editor Theresa...off to wash her mug that's grown significant mold since last Friday...

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Balsamic Vinaigrette

Ingredients:
2/3 cup organic balsamic to 1/3 cup organic EVOO (Trader Joe's does a very acceptable version of both)
Dollop of organic sweet mustard
Dash of organic half and half (optional)
4 cloves garlic, chopped (I roll hard with garlic, but maybe you're a vampire, or you just don't like garlic...)
Freshly ground pepper to taste

Mix the balsamic in the EVOO. It naturally separates so don't kill yourself overwhipping it. Add the dollop of mustard and the dash of half and half. Whip again. Add the chopped garlic and pepper. Grab a spoon and serve.

-SF Editor Hanah...off to OD on salad...

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With the latest iPhone update, you can get driving, walking, and public transportation directions just by entering start and end points in the Map application, clicking Route, and then selecting the car, bus, or pedestrian icon at the top. Up pops: distance and expected transit time - and for buses, the bus line, bus fare, and when it departs from your starting location.

At this moment, if I walk from home to work, it'll take me 25 minutes door to door to travel the 1.3 miles. Spot on. Or, I could take the 30 Stockton bus, leaving the stop 1.5 blocks from my house in seven minutes. It will cost me $1.50, and I will be at work 12 minutes after it leaves.

iAm amazed.

-Jenifer...off to stomp that 1.3 miles...

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