Seattle :

It Was the Breast of Times - April Fools' Day

04.01.2009

Submitted by jharper on Tue, 03/31/2009 - 11:00pm.
The Bite:
Wanna further develop the tale of your two titties? Fill 'em out with the revolutionary new eco-implants, Sand Dunes. Local high school freshman Todd Thompkins created these sand-filled enhancers after hearing from junior Chet Akers that breasts do in fact feel just like bags of sand. Each implant uses between 200 and 400 grams of sand sustainably gathered from local beaches with at least a 12-inch base of sand. Plus, loading up your girls with sand - precombed for shells and tiny crabs - is far more eco than the silicone alternative, which can contain known carcinogens like formaldehyde and benzene. Next up: Beach Bums, for boosting your derriere. Novel idea.
Wanna Try: 
Sand Dunes, not yet approved by the FDA for bolstering bosoms, only for pulling legs.
LIKE THIS TIP? TRY THIS: 
The Organic Lingerie Tip
The Green Swimwear Tip

Cocktail Fact

After her latest procedure in February, a TX woman, now a triple-K cup, broke the record for largest breast implants.

Small Changes Add Up

If 10,000 Seattle Biters opt for sand-filled breast implants rather than silicone ones, we'll keep the weight of 44 Pam Andersons in gnarly chems outta our bods.

0 comments
Bookmark and Share
  Email This

Post new comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
  • Web page addresses and e-mail addresses turn into links automatically.
  • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <font> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd> <p> <br> <img>

More information about formatting options

 

All editorial suggestions in this tip are the result of testing and a preference for the tip topic. No advertiser has paid to have its company referenced in the tip. For more information, please read our Editorial Policy.