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BANG FOR THE BITE
Never say, "I hope you like it!" again. Know they'll like it, conserve resources, and save everyone from getting unwanted stuff.
COCKTAIL FACT
Saturday Night Live's "D*** in a Box" short is the fifth most viewed video of all time on YouTube.
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home › tip library › How to Stop Giving Gifts
Ready to think outside the gift-giving box?
The Bite
We are too. We've all given and received gifts out of obligation - but let's face it, many gifts are really unwanted (read: junk). Stop the madness, and make a pact with your friends 'n' fam to get each other a gift only when you are moved to give, not obligated.The Benefits
- Getting gifts you actually want. The thought really does count.
- More space. No whatchamacallits collecting dust and creating clutter.
- Consuming fewer resources. If everyone in the world lived like an American, we'd need five Earths to support our highly consumptive habits.
- Getting gifts when you least expect them (say, a Christmas gift in July) is fun, especially because you'll know the gifter was truly inspired to give.
Personally Speaking
Note of advice to future love interests of Heather's: Don't give her a bong as a gag gift. They're really hard to regift, and Goodwill's not particularly keen on them as donations.Wanna Try?
- Make the Pact - agree that less is more among friends and fam.
- freecycle and craigslist - post stuff you don't want online. Your trash may be someone else's treasure.
- Clear Some Closet Space - in case you need to store those perfect gifts you find while you hunt down recycled wrapping paper.
Jun 18,2007
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All editorial suggestions in this tip are the result of testing and a preference for the tip topic. No advertiser has paid to have its company referenced in the tip. For more information, please read our Editorial Policy.
Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.
Oh, for god's sake, won't you please, please, please stop it?
Stop with the soaps and the candles and the hothouse flowers and the little trinkets and the earrings I'll never wear and the tchotskes I don't want to dust off and the random tanktops with strange logos and all the shit in bags and boxes, wrapped in plastic and paper, just crying out to be left behind in the restaurant after the birthday party, because - let's face it - we're all drunk and no one can keep track of the bill, let alone a passel of presents...
I. Don't. Want. Random. Obligatory. Gifts.
And because I love you, I promise you, I will never get you one ever again. If it doesn't SCREAM your name, I'm not buying it. I don't care if it's the right time of year or not. Yes, if I know that you LOVE that candle or can't get enough of that soap or have a desperate need for that trinket, it's yours. Even if not your birthday or Christmas or anniversary, you'll get it, and I'll either save it for the special day, or just give you a Christmas present in August.
But people, please. No more obligatory gifts.
Well, unless it's wine. Even I will remember to grab that before leaving the party.
-Heather... off to take a box of stuff to Goodwill...
Biter Comments...
You can try this website about ecological footprints. It may not have the exact fact you are looking for, but plenty of other disturbing information.
http://www.earthday.net/footprint/index.asp
Our family STOPPED sending Christmas gifts to each other but we LOVE celebrating our birthdays and being special for a day. However, we have made a pact of sharing an EXPERIENCE rather than STUFF - movies, plays, concerts, spas, housecleaning gifts,road trips, plane trips...wine ALWAYS welcome. WHINE never welcome.
If you feel obliged to give a gift, and there are still many social situations that do require this, why not make a gift to charity on the recipient's behalf? We definitely consume too much in the US, but there are many people who lack so many goods and services. Or you could even just make a gift to an environmentally friendly organization that is planting trees, improving energy efficiency in the homes of poor communities, etc.
Tell Heather I'll gladly take the bong off her hands. PHIL
I would like to echo the point about giving to a charity. That is what we do in my family. We either give to a charity that the gift recipient is passionate about, or in the case of those who are less socially conscious, seek out a charity that they may become passionate about. Like my brother who is 16, doesn't care about much besides football and guitar, so last Christmas we gave him a contribution to a charity that was trying to get guitars, etc. for all of the musicians who lost them in Katrina.
I agree with the EXPERIENCE posted by Terri. I gave experiences last year for Christmas and it worked out so well....and shopping was not an experience...but going to the zoo, out to dinner, to the movies, to have a manicure, etc. were all in the mix...and tailored to the recipient.
I am also a big fan of receiving a donation in my name to a favorite cause..that always scores big points in my book because my friends who are paying attention get it: I DON'T LIKE STUFF!!!!! :)
(I loved this tip, btw)
Love the funny tip headline; good comments.
Brilliant tip! My family is in the process of cleaning out the house of my raised in the Depression, pack-rat, bargain-loving grandmother who has recently had to move to assisted living and has left behind about 30 years worth of accumulation. The boxes of stuff sitting unused in this house are unbelievable!!! My husband and I are both of the mindset that if it doesn't get used and/or we don't totally love it then we don't need it, but cleaning out this house continues to inspire me to be the thrift store's very good friend.
I will also take any unneeded bongs off your hands.
I hear you about the gifts! I've received enough candles to burn around the clock the rest of my life...
Here's an idea - a gift that actually reduces junk - junk mail, that is. You can give a 41 Pounds gift certificate (by email or printed) and get rid of your loved one's junk mail for 5 years. Check it out at www.41pounds.org. The service costs $8.20 a year to get rid of the 41 Pounds of junk mail we receive every year. We can save trees, water, greenhouse gas emissions while getting rid of the piles of junk mail!
Rather than giving next year's garage sale items to my family for gifts I give that much money to a charity. Unfortunately, my family has been greatly affected by cancer, so, the American Cancer Society gets about $125-$150 a year from me, in my family members' names.
I shared this tip with people at work, and we all think it's great, but are now really interested to hear the full story behind the "Personally Speaking" blurb - how did you get such a "thought provoking" gift, and how exactly does one get rid of a bong? I'm assuming it get broken down and the glass, metal, rubber get recycled, but there are probably endless possibilities for repurposing it; decorative vase, didgeridoo...anyone else have ideas? I think you've hit upon (sorry) a great topic for future Ideal Bites!
I just took some clothing to Goodwill this weekend...what a mob scene! I said to the guy working there, "Garage sales just ending?" He said, "I wish I could ban garage sales...people have too much junk, then when they cannot get rid of it at a sale, they bring it here to us and go out to buy more junk that will show up here in 6 months to a year!" He made a strong case...too much junk, even the Goodwill guy doesn't want it...what does that say?
Thanks for the tip today,
Susan
Love the tip and I recently found a website where friends and family can list exactly what they want to share it with others so you get exactly what you want/need and nothing else. (http://www.thethingsiwant.com/)
I just used this for my b-day with my hubby and it worked out perfectly!
I just celebrated a birthday and also did not want any gifts. On my invitations I instead asked for non-pershiable food donations. My local food pantry was thrilled with the carload of groceries and I have no stuff to return, put away or agonize over what to do with it.
I love this tip, but I don't know how to get my family to play along. When I tell them I don't want anything, they buy me things anyway. If I didn't give them gifts on holidays, I would instantly be the family jerk - they would consider that weird, mean-spirited and cheap. I really like the idea of giving experiences instead of things! I think I'm going to try that and see how well it goes over.
This is for Tara to jump-start the experiences idea-list. The trick to making experiences the "right" gift is to really research the recipient so that you find something that will delight them. Here's a few:
- a day at the zoo (the local zoo did not have a gift certificate so I made "vouchers" which I attached to Endangered Species Chocolate Bars. In an envelope, I gave the family cash to cover admission and parking).
- movie passes or Netflix/Blockbuster gift membership
- manicure/pedicure certificate
- gift certificate to a theater or theater organization or arts organization (ballet, symphony, etc.) (in NYC, you can purchase 1/2 price tickets to same-day shows). The friend I gave this to used it the very same day to buy a ticket to a Broadway show at 1/2 off
- dinner/lunch at a restaurant (for a few people, I gave them the knowledge that we'd do this together at a place of their choosing, instead of sending them a gift certificate to the restaurant)
- my elderly grandmother loves to go "junking" (shop at yard sales, thrift stores, etc.) but has stopped b/c of the price of gas. I basically gave her a gas card/gas certificate to get junking again.
- miniature golf/arcade passes
- driving range (golf) pass
- membership to a museum
- gift certificate to a favorite coffee house
- a massage at a spa
- a vacation/special trip
- a night or a few at a B&B
- an amusement park gift certificate
- a homemade certificate to do something important to them together (write out a will, defrost their ancient freezer, weed their garden, etc.)
- membership to a park/conservation organization in their area
- lessons/a class (dance, musical instrument, culinary, etc.)
- I did give the "experience" of music for an Ipod, even though I wasn't super-keen on that idea as an experience. It depends on the recipient.
I was careful to NOT give experiences of shopping (i.e., gift cards to book stores, clothing stores, etc.)
I hope it helps! You won't look cheap (some of the ideas were actually more expensive than what I would've done otherwise) and hopefully your family will start to get the hint!
Happy Experience Giving!
Damon, THANK YOU!! Those are all excellent ideas and very helpful. I've always been a gift-card hater, because it just feels like a cop out to me (as in, "I couldn't think of anything to get you, so here's a gift card"). This makes the gift much more personal. Your list really does a great job of covering all ages, too. I will certainly put it to good use!
I give what I make with my own hands from scratch. That includes cold process soaps, natural lotions or soy candles. People love them!
Irena
www.gingersgarden.com
PHOTO ALBUMS
Posted by: Christy | June 18, 2007 at 06:55 AM